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Breaking the Cycle: Becoming Who God Made You to Be

A reflection on generational healing and the courage to feel what was left unspoken

They said:

“I don’t want to be like my parents.”

I answered:

Then you have to do what they couldn’t. Feel what they avoided. Say what they silenced. And heal what they passed down. You don’t break the cycle by becoming someone else. You break it by becoming more you than you were ever allowed to be. — Nadia Addesi

 

It’s not enough to say, “I don’t want to be like them,” because that determination is usually defiled with a judgment. That alone doesn’t change anything. The cycle is not broken by rejection but by redemption. You break it by choosing to feel what they could not face. By sitting in the discomfort they avoided. By naming the things they kept quiet because it was easier, safer, or more acceptable not to.


Cycle breaking is not about discarding your parents’ identity or running from their shadows. It is about reclaiming the parts of yourself that were hidden, silenced, or reshaped to fit someone else’s comfort. It is about allowing the Holy Spirit to bring healing where generations carried unspoken wounds. This work also requires you to reflect on where you have judged or dishonoured them, bringing those sinful responses to effective death at the cross of Christ through confession, repentance, and forgiving from the heart.


This work is slow and tender. Painful at times. You will be tempted to bypass it with logic or distance or blame. Yet those detours never rewire the patterns. The only way it ends with you is if you do what they could not do. Say what they would not say. Feel what they would not feel. Let Christ redeem what was broken so that grace flows into the generations after you.

📖 “Therefore if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; old things have passed away; behold, all things have become new.” — 2 Corinthians 5:17 (NKJV)

 

💡Reflection:

  • What feelings have you been tempted to avoid that might carry keys to your healing?

  • Which silences in your family line are you being called to name in truth and love?

  • Where have you judged or dishonoured your parents, and how can you bring those responses to the cross of Christ?

  • Where do you sense the Holy Spirit inviting you to choose redemption over rejection?


🙌Prayer:

Father God, thank You that in Christ, I am a new creation. Please help me to have the courage to feel what was avoided, to speak what was silenced, and to bring healing to the places that carry generational pain. Forgive me where I have judged or dishonoured my parents. I lay those sinful responses at the cross and ask You to cleanse me as I choose to forgive from the heart. Redeem my family line through me, Lord, and let the cycle of brokenness end here. May my life be a testimony of Your grace, creating a new legacy rooted in faith, love, and freedom. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.

Monday, 8 September 2025

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