It’s hard to put into words what it feels like when something you poured your soul into — late nights, prayerful edits, hours upon hours of quiet service — is replaced without warning. No conversation. No acknowledgement. Just… gone.

Still working through the "Rediscover Yourself in 5 Days" journal... This time the assignment was to write a letter to yourself as if you were this woman already and to write her a letter as if you were cheering her on, celebrating her wins and inviting her into reality.

I was working through a "Rediscover Yourself in 5 Days" journal and had to do this activity. Take a moment and imagine the best, most fulfilled version of yourself - the woman you're re-discovering. What does she look like? How does she carry herself? How does she feel about her life? What is she like? What's her energy like? What's her purpose? What's her secret to happiness?

I can still feel the butterflies. Not the delicate kind flitting through gardens, but the kind that seems to take up residence in your belly when God asks you to do something bold. Something brave. Something that feels way bigger than you.

The video features a heartfelt discussion on trauma, healing, and the power of creativity, led by Patrizia Schwartz, a mixed-media artist and healer. Patrizia shares her personal story, detailing her struggles with feelings of unworthiness stemming from being born post-abortion and the subsequent trauma she faced throughout her life, including experiences of molestation and multiple miscarriages.

Heavenly Father As I step into this week, I refuse to hide. No more shrinking. No more running. No more pretending to be anything less than who You created me to be. I am chosen—not overlooked, not forgotten, not misplaced. Chosen. And because You have called me, I will no longer allow fear, doubt, or the opinions of others to keep me in the shadows. Lord, there are times when I’ve seen myself as a grasshopper, even while You’re calling me a giant. And for the times I’ve shrunk back, stayed silent, or run from my calling—I repent. I repent for withholding my voice when You’ve asked me to speak. I repent for running from the mandate to take Your healing to the nations, to testify of Your miraculous works in my life so that others, too, may find healing and transformation. And thank You, Lord, for working on me—shaping me—so I don’t just know I’m a giant in the Spirit, but feel it. So that when I rise to speak, the world will see the giant You created me to be, not the grasshopper I once believed I was. You have filled my heart, You have given me a voice, and You have called me to stand. So I pray, Lord, as I step into the places You have assigned to me, that the giant within me will rise—not for my glory, but for Yours. God, I admit there were times when hiding felt safer. When blending in seemed easier. When it felt more comfortable to dim my light than to risk being seen. But not this week. No more... I repent for those moments of retreat. And this is the week I step forward. This is the week I embrace who I am. This is the week I stop apologising for the way You set me apart. I don’t need permission to be who You created me to be. I don’t need validation to walk in my calling. I don’t need approval to take up space in the places You’ve prepared for me. I just need faith… The kind that silences every doubt. The kind that pushes past every insecurity. The kind that reminds me You don’t choose people by accident. So, I step out. I stand tall. I walk boldly. I am chosen. And I will no longer hide. I will speak up so that Your message of healing 💔heARTs 💖 can reach the broken-hearted. So that together, we can change the world—one 💔heart💖 at a time. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.

Have you ever felt overwhelmed by life’s struggles and pressures, longing for a sense of peace and relaxation? I know that feeling all too well. My own journey has been one of rediscovering creativity as a powerful tool for healing my 💔heart💖. Yet, too many of us believe we are not creative at all.

This weekend, I attended the Speakers Institute Premiere Bootcamp (13–15 March 2025) — three days that felt like being both undone and remade. Among the many experiences that shaped me, the “Sugar Cubes” stand out — those small, handwritten notes of encouragement and truth given by fellow attendees and crew. Each word carried warmth, like light breaking through the cracks of old lies. They were more than affirmations. They were prophetic whispers, wrapped in human handwriting — golden seams of grace gently mending what had once been fractured by fear, shame, and doubt. Courage & Transformation As I read through the notes, the first theme that stirred in my heart was courage. “Patrizia, you have transformed this weekend. This is the great start to the future you’ve always dreamt of.” Someone saw transformation in me before I could see it myself. They saw courage where I had felt trembling, and purpose where I had seen uncertainty. Another wrote, “You did it! All the best with Healing 💔heARTs💖.” I smiled reading that, realising this wasn’t just about a talk on stage — it was about standing tall in my story, unashamed of the journey that shaped me. I heard Heaven whisper, “Be strong and courageous; do not be afraid… for I am with you.” 📖 Joshua 1:9 (NKJV) These words became an altar in my heart. Transformation, I’ve learned, doesn’t arrive with applause. It begins quietly — when I choose to stand, even when my knees still shake. Creativity & Calling Many spoke to my creative heart — that part of me that has always found God in colour, texture, and broken pottery turned beautiful. “The inner artist is waiting to come out of all of us. Keep going on your mission to awaken that! You matter.” Those words reached deep. For so long, I’d questioned whether my creativity had real purpose beyond beauty. Yet through these notes, I heard confirmation that my art is more than expression — it’s ministry. It heals, awakens, and restores. 📖 “We are His workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works.” — Ephesians 2:10 (NKJV) He paints through my hands, and each brushstroke becomes a prayer of restoration. Compassion & Connection “Your resilience is inspiring.” “Your smiling eyes are a gift.” “Your compassion brings warmth to every room.” These words caught me off guard — because for years, I felt unseen. Yet through others’ eyes, I began to glimpse what Heaven sees: a woman who carries kindness like a quiet strength. 📖 “Put on tender mercies, kindness, humility, meekness, longsuffering.” — Colossians 3:12 (NKJV) Compassion has always been the thread of my story — the way I meet the broken-hearted, the way I sense God’s heart through tears and touch. These cubes reminded me: compassion is not weakness; it is the heartbeat of Jesus within me. Faith & Belief “Keep believing in yourself.” “Females like you give me the strength to believe in myself.” Each message was a reflection of faith mirrored back to me. When I’ve doubted my voice or my calling, He’s used others to remind me that belief is not arrogance — it’s obedience. 📖 “For we walk by faith, not by sight.” — 2 Corinthians 5:7 (NKJV) Faith is seeing through Heaven’s eyes when everything around me still looks uncertain. Joy & Radiance Someone wrote, “Embrace that joy,” and another, “You are joy.” These two simple sentences felt like sunlight touching my soul. Joy is not always laughter; sometimes it’s resilience. It’s that quiet decision to keep shining when the night feels long. 📖 “The joy of the Lord is your strength.” — Nehemiah 8:10 (NKJV) I’ve spent years believing I was too much — too emotional, too sensitive. Yet perhaps, I was simply made to feel deeply so that I could love deeply. These notes reminded me that joy, even in brokenness, is holy. Stagecraft & Expression “The pause was good.” “Your expressions were perfect — I thought they were intentional.” “Belongs on stage.” Reading these words, I smiled. The stage once terrified me — a place of exposure. Now I see it differently. The stage is not a platform of pride; it’s an altar of surrender. Every pause, every tear, every trembling breath — all become worship. 📖 “Let your light so shine before men.” — Matthew 5:16 (NKJV) It’s not about performance but presence. His presence. Legacy & Purpose “You are a shining light.” “You matter.” “Your story is powerful.” “Spectacular — perfect in all aspects.” Legacy, I realise, is not about achievement but about impact. Each word written by a stranger or friend felt like God saying, ‘I see you sowing light into dark places.’ 📖 “Those who are wise shall shine like the brightness of the firmament.” — Daniel 12:3 (NKJV) Their words are fruit from seeds I’ve sown in obedience — reminders that no word of truth, no act of love, ever falls to the ground unnoticed. Closing Reflection — Golden Seams of Grace These “Sugar Cubes” now sit tucked away in a small box on my desk. Yet their words echo louder than any applause ever could. They speak to my soul — to the little girl who once believed she was too broken, too small, too much. Each note is a golden seam in the vessel of my heart — Heaven’s way of saying, “See, I am mending you with grace.” When lies return to whisper, I will hold these truths close: ✨ My story is already a testimony. ✨ My voice already heals hearts. ✨ My presence already shines His light. 📖 “He will give you a crown of beauty for ashes, joy for mourning, and praise for heaviness.” — Isaiah 61:3 (NKJV) Prayer Lord Jesus, Thank You for speaking through these precious souls — for letting their words become mirrors reflecting Heaven’s truth over me. Where I once saw failure, You now show fruit. Where I once heard lies, You now whisper love. May I never forget that the gold in my cracks is You — the Healer, the Artist, the Author of my story. Let my life forever testify that brokenness, when surrendered, becomes beauty. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.

For far too long, the fear of failure and rejection held me captive, ensnaring me in a cycle of procrastination that stifled my growth. Throughout my life, so many people have told me that my story — overcoming a lifelong battle with depression and suicidal thoughts — should go global and that I should write a book. When it came to creativity, I once believed the lies: I can't sing. I can't dance. I can't draw. I can't paint. I'm not creative. But over the past six years, those lies have been dismantled — one by one — until only two remained: I can't write, and I can't speak in public!

As a teenager, I harboured dreams of becoming a singer. But at 18, a pivotal moment arrived in the form of a dream: there I was, standing on a stage, yet when I woke, a wave of doubt washed over me, convincing me that such dreams were nothing more than fanciful illusions. In that moment, I told myself it would never happen because I wasn’t good enough. I would hide in the choir for many years before I finally made it into the worship team at our church. Now, I’m gearing up to confront my fear of public speaking head-on over the next three days at the Speakers Institute bootcamp. For far too long, the shadows of failure and rejection have held me captive, ensnaring me in a cycle of procrastination that has stifled my growth. I’ve come to an important realisation: if I’m genuinely going to lead Nexus Connect Community and bring my vision of a vibrant creative community centre to life, I must learn to embrace speaking to crowds with grace and confidence. I've come to realise that if I’m truly going to lead Nexus Connect Community and bring my vision of a creative community centre to life, I need to become comfortable speaking to crowds. Just the other day, a friend shared that he envisions me gracing the stages of stadiums. However to, reach that point, I must first embrace and overcome the challenge of speaking in front of an audience. Yesterday was particularly overwhelming; the pressure felt tangible, almost suffocating. I spent an hour handwriting my speech off by heart. I realised it's not that I don’t know my content — it's just that elusive connection between my thoughts and my words. In that moment of anxiety, I reached out to Clive, who offered the support I desperately needed to ease my worries. Surprisingly, I’m not in complete panic mode right now. As John Maxwell wisely teaches, nobody makes it to the top of Mt. Everest alone. With that in mind, here I stand, bracing myself for three intensive days of training. This journey is about equipping myself to step boldly into the role I’ve been called to fulfil. It’s time to banish those fears and embrace the journey ahead with an open heart. Thank You, Lord, for calling me for such a time as this. It’s truly humbling to recognise that You have imparted everything I need for life and godliness. You don’t call the qualified; instead, You graciously qualify those who are willing to step forward and take on the journey You have laid before them. I find tremendous comfort in knowing that my inadequacies do not define me. It’s not about being the most skilled or experienced; it’s about having the heart to say, "Yes, I’m willing." Here I am, Lord—send me. With each new opportunity, I feel Your presence encouraging me to embrace this purpose and innate calling. I’m reminded that I’m not alone in this venture; Your strength fills the gaps where I may feel weak, and Your guidance illuminates each step on this path. I trust that as I surrender my fears and insecurities to You, You will shape me into the vessel You need me to be. So, I step forward with faith, ready to embrace the journey ahead. Thank You for every moment, every experience, and every lesson that has brought me to this point. I’m excited to see how You will work through me, transforming challenges into triumphs as I walk in obedience, fully confident that I have been chosen for this unique purpose.

Thank You, Jesus, for coming to heal the broken-hearted 💔 and to bind up their wounds. Your presence brings solace to those of us who feel shattered, offering a promise of restoration where despair once reigned. My journey has been profoundly shaped by a tapestry woven with threads of pain — echoes of emotional neglect threaded through my earliest memories, accompanied by the sharp sting of relentless criticism, the confusion brought on by displacement trauma, and the heavy burden of betrayal, rejection, and abandonment at the hands of various carers and authority figures. Yet, among these scars, the deepest wound cuts through my soul like a silent knife were my brother’s silence. Thirty long years of estrangement, caused by a web of lies, have left an ache that words can scarcely capture. That unspoken rift turned into a quiet torment, a constant reminder of what I'd lost amidst the storms I had to weather, until the day he finally reached out to reconcile. Those of us who are loyal often take things to heart. We invest ourselves wholeheartedly, and our commitment runs deep. My loyalty is steadfast, and I love without reservation. When people dismiss me, I find myself continuing to love from a distance. It’s simply who I am; writing off those who treat me unkindly is not in my nature. That’s why being ignored or overlooked by those I hold dear cuts particularly deep. Time and again, You’ve stooped down to gather the fragmented pieces of my heart, piecing them together with a tenderness I scarcely understand. Your grace has been my refuge, a balm for wounds both old and raw. And yet, even now, there are moments when the smallest things — an unanswered text, a fleeting silence — can feel like daggers piercing my heart. Such triggers resurrect the familiar spectres of rejection and abandonment, tugging at the fragile seams of my healing. It’s a reminder of how deep those wounds run, but also of how desperately I need Your continued touch to mend what remains broken. Lord, my heart 💔 aches. Would You come and bring Your peace and healing?

My heart aches every time I hear someone say: "I can't sing!" "I can't dance!" "I can't draw!" "I can't paint!" "I can't write!" "I can't speak!" "I'm not creative!" You see, I, too, had buried my fear of failure and rejection under this mountain of LIES until the Lord took me on a journey of profound healing, restoration, and transformation. Creativity has always been a part of who I am, but it took years for me to fully embrace it. In I'm Creative, I share my journey of rediscovering the artistic spark that had been buried under the weight of life’s responsibilities. From childhood sketches to mixed-media explorations, this is the story of how I found my way back to creativity—and how it became a powerful expression of faith, healing, and joy.

The words 'I AM...' carry immense significance in shaping our identities and perceptions. Uncover the truth behind your self-statements and their impact on your personal & professional journey I have learned to be mindful of what I attach to "I am..." in my statements.   Some of the most deeply ingrained lies we believe about ourselves are hidden within these very words.   "I AM..." is a declaration of identity—yet, all too often, we confuse our temporary emotions with who we truly are.   When we say, "I am angry, anxious, sad, sick, tired, depressed," we are unconsciously reinforcing the idea that these emotions define us. We are speaking negativity over ourselves, and over time, our bodies will manifest more of these burdens.   But there is another way.   By reframing our statements, we empower ourselves to separate our identity from our emotions. We acknowledge them for what they are—passing experiences. Saying "I feel angry, anxious, or sad" validates the emotion without allowing it to take root in our identity.   This small but powerful shift creates space for healing and growth. It helps us process our emotions while keeping our true selves intact.   Emotions are transient; they ebb and flow like the tide—they are not permanent, and they do not define us. By recognising this, we cultivate resilience, a healthier mindset, a more positive outlook on life and a greater capacity for growth.   So let’s be intentional with our words. Instead of "I am...", let’s embrace the life-giving phrase, "I feel...".   It’s a simple change, but one that can  lead to profound transformation in the way we see ourselves and navigate life’s challenges.   REMEMBER: You are not your emotions. You are so much more than that —strong, ever-evolving, and full of possibility. You are capable of navigating through life's ups and downs with grace and strength.   I'm talking to the coir as I write this. Over the past 5 years, I've confessed and repented of many foundational lies.. I'm worthless I'm not good enough I'm ill-equipped I'm stupid I'm unloved I'm unwanted I'm not creative … to name just a few…   The truth is, that when God created the earth and everything on it, He said: "It is good", but after God created Adam and Eve, He said: "It is very good" (Genesis 1:31). We are beautifully and wonderfully made (Psalm 139:14). He loves us with an everlasting love (Jeremiah 31:3). We are His workmanship created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand so we would walk in them  (Ephesians 2:10). He has already given us ALL we need for life and godliness (2 Peter 1:3).   What lies have you come to believe about yourself that you need to bring to death at the cross today?🤔

In the Maxwell Growth Plan coaching John Maxwell teaches to grow yourself, you must know yourself. Well, if you asked me "Who are You" a couple of weeks ago, I would have told you I don't know. In all my life's people pleasing I had forgotten WHO I am so this journey of self-awareness as part of the course is quite difficult for me. What I've realised whilst doing this is part of the reason I've been struggling with depression all my life is the fact that I had many expectations and inner vows preventing me from being who I was created to be. I spent my life trying to be who I perceived others wanted me to be and therefore undermining my integrity & causing a constant inner turmoil, guilt & shame for being "fake" and feeling like an imposter. I discovered that my belief that I can't be trusted is rooted in my lack of integrity towards myself. Over the years I've signed up for so many courses & activities I had planned to do to enhance my potential but then I would sacrifice that on the altar of someone else's needs being more important than mine.

There was a season when depression clung to me like a second skin, so familiar that I could not imagine life without its weight. From childhood into adulthood, I carried a heaviness that never truly lifted, a quiet sorrow beneath everything I touched, a longing for rest that felt unreachable. There were days when the darkness whispered that I did not belong here, days when the thought that ending my life felt like the only way to silence the ache inside. I loved God and followed Him, yet something in me felt fractured, unworthy, unseen, and unbearably tired. I tried to fix myself through striving, serving, and staying busy; the heaviness remained. I believed it was simply my personality, just "how I am", until the Holy Spirit gently revealed that depression was not my identity. It was a spiritual battle woven through fear, rejection, and deep layers of self-hatred that had taken root long before I had language for it. There came a day when I could no longer carry it. I remember sitting alone, feeling the familiar wave of despair pressing against my chest I had just watched an online sermon by Sarah Jakes Roberts and whispered the smallest prayer, "Jesus, I can't do this anymore, if You do not set me free, I will not survive this." It was not loud or poetic. It was honest. It was surrender. It was the moment heaven leaned close. Christ met me in the very place I feared He would reject me. He set me on a long journey to inner healing. He showed me the roots, including generations of shame, childhood moments where my voice was silenced, lies that shaped my self-worth, and an unloving spirit that had whispered over me for years. He revealed that the battle was not in my brain chemistry but in my belief system. My body had been responding to wounds I was taught to hide. Healing began when He led me to repent for partnering with the spirit of death through suicidal ideations, self-hatred and fear, not as blame but as release. I renounced the unloving spirit that convinced me I was unworthy of love, the spirit of accusation that echoed through my thoughts, and the bitterness I held toward myself. Heaven’s peace replaced the torment. The grip of suicidal thoughts broke. The fog lifted. Joy — true, steady, unmanufactured joy — began to grow in places that had been barren for decades. This deliverance was not a moment of emotional excitement; it was a shift in the very atmosphere of my soul. It felt as though Someone stepped into the room, took my face gently in His hands, and whispered, "Daughter, I did not create you for death. Live." Since then, my body has followed the healing that began in my spirit. The oppressive weight that once felt normal is no longer my constant companion. I wake with hope. I rest with peace. The suicidal thoughts that shadowed my youth no longer have a voice. The darkness that stalked me for years has been silenced by the One who is Light. 📖 "He brought me up out of a horrible pit, out of the miry clay, and set my feet upon a rock." — Psalm 40:2 (NKJV) I do not pretend that healing erased every difficult day. Life still brings storms; I no longer drown in them. The spirit of heaviness still comes from time to time, but depression no longer defines me. Suicidal despair no longer calls my name. Christ lifted me out of what was killing me and taught me that emotional pain is not a prison; it is a place where His love can break in. I share this testimony because someone else’s freedom may begin where my silence ends. My healing is not proof of my strength; it is proof of His mercy. I stand here today because God stepped into the deepest places of my story and restored what years of sorrow tried to destroy. He replaced death with life, despair with hope, and broken identity with belovedness. 📖 "Therefore if the Son makes you free, you shall be free indeed." — John 8:36 (NKJV) Today, I celebrate six years of overcoming, and I believe that if He delivered me, He can deliver you. There is no darkness He cannot reach, no root He cannot uproot, no lie He cannot silence. The same Jesus who rescued me stands ready to restore every heart that calls upon His Name. 💡 Reflection • Where have I mistaken a wound for part of my identity? 🤔 • What emotions or memories might the Holy Spirit be inviting me to bring into His light? 🤔 • What agreements with fear, rejection, or self-hatred am I ready to release? 🤔 • How has God met me in places I once believed were too dark or too broken? 🤔 🎺 Affirmation I am no longer defined by the shadows that once surrounded me. I walk in the freedom Christ purchased for me, held, healed, and wholly loved. His light is my home, and my life is a testimony of His mercy. 🙌 Prayer Jesus, thank You for stepping into the deepest places of my heart and lifting me out of the despair that once defined my days. Thank You for breaking the chains of self-hatred, fear, and hopelessness, and for speaking life over places that once felt unreachable. Teach me to walk in the fullness of the freedom You have given me. Fill every corner of my soul with Your peace, Your truth, and Your unwavering love. Strengthen me to be a light for those still battling the shadows. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.

God has so graciously redeemed my birthday and as I pause to reflect on the journey I’ve travelled – the mountains I’ve climbed and the valleys I’ve navigated – I see every reason to celebrate. First of all, thank you. Each of you has contributed to my story, creating a safe space for me to heal. I wouldn’t be standing here today without your love bringing me back to life. This year has been extraordinary — marked by growth, breakthroughs, and deep healing. It was a season when I stepped into spaces I once thought were impossible. This hasn’t been a path I’ve walked alone, and my heart overflows with gratitude for those who have stood by me, encouraged me, and lifted me along the way.

These make-shift flags have been waiting for me to make them permanent since we got back from our anniversary holiday early November last year. By sewing my flags, I am reclaiming control of my life and making a concerted effort to revitalise the colour and vitality that has been absent. It is high time these beauties were utilised to proclaim God's glory and colour in my life. This year, I am determined to shift from survival & procrastination mode to growth and thriving. Watch this space become 202(5)THRIVE. As Marc Bredenkamp used to say decades ago: "I see you somewhere in the future & you look much better than you look right now!"

With last week's office reshuffle and the little writing desk being gifted, it neccetated me working through this basket filled with paperwork to see what could be shredded and what needed filing. My ability to organise things broke when I broke 💔, and that’s one area I haven’t been able to restore yet. The mere thought of the amount of stuff I've let slide home in that time has been overwhelming, keeping me in procrastination and stopping me from doing anything about it. But this afternoon, when I got home from the office, I decided that this little mountain would be conquered today so I could check it off my list of procrastination items. In the process, I stumbled across a few thank-you cards from my Encounter groups at the end of 2023... ... one of them contained $60... what a lovely surprise 😮 And then there was this little gem... My heart still skips a beat every time I see this little munchkin... Although not by blood, for 18 months, I had the incredible privilege of being his Oma, and their departure has left a void in my heart, but in my heart, Sean will always be my grandson... I must confess, I still often wonder how he is & whether he's happy & healthy, but I no longer suppress and deny those thoughts & feelings, and they no longer bring me to tears. I pray the Lord will protect him & keep him safe. Then there was this giant surprise... For someone who thought she was worthless, stupid, not good enough, etc., doing a 3-month graphic design course when I was at rock-bottom and then achieving this is no small feat... I don't even remember seeing this report back then, but I can't help but wonder how the heck did I accomplish this?🤔 Clive remembered it when I showed him and said he was as surprised I continued going and finished the course as he was with the grades. I was blown away when I saw this and even more flabbergasted that I hadn't even filed it with my certificates... There's one of those glimpses of gold & diamonds Elias saw in me, and I guess my friend Zoë was right after all when she called me her "brainy" girl.

Last month, I invested in an online course to help uproot my self-limiting beliefs. (Apparently, the Lord isn’t done nudging me to invest in myself yet...) This morning, I woke at 2:45 to attend the first of six live events, running from 3 to 7 am every Monday for the next six weeks. Believe me, the temptation to roll over and go back to sleep was immense. But having told Clive about it last night, I felt compelled to honour my word. Oh boy—what was I thinking? In a quiet, reflective moment, I connected the dots between my lack of self-trust and the deeply ingrained belief that “I can’t be trusted.” I realised, with painful clarity, how many times I’ve let myself down over the years by not following through on commitments I’ve made to myself. I’ve always honoured my word and promises to others, yet when it comes to me, I’ve always failed miserably. A little later, after feeding my friend’s cat, I spontaneously found myself heading down to the beach, completely overwhelmed. There I stood, momentarily consumed by regret, chastising myself for decades of self-sabotage and procrastination that's caused dreams and aspirations to be crushed. The weight of what being stuck in fear has cost me—and by extension, those within my sphere of influence—was crushing. But then, I could almost hear Elias's voice in my head saying, “Stop it! or I’ll bury you in a box 📦.” (It’s been a while since that familiar threat reared its head—clearly, I haven’t bullied myself much at the office lately.) Yet, in the midst of it all, something shifted. After many tears, heartfelt prayer, and repentance right there in the water, I felt a glimmer of lightness and hope. I’m ready to keep going and catch up on the personal growth I’ve let slip through my fingers. How thankful I am that the Lord can redeem the time, turn my mess into a message, and transform this mountain into yet another story that brings Him glory. How grateful I am for His comforting presence and that the Lord can redeem the time, turn my mess into a message, and transform this mountain into another story of His glory. I'm also grateful for Ester who, during our call later, promptly reminded me how far I've come to pick myself up in a matter of minutes, which used to take days & weeks before. I must admit, I find it interesting 🤔 something so significant always pops up within 3 weeks of scheduled serving at an Elijah House school.

As I look back over the year that was 2024, I see a mosaic of moments — tender, stretching, healing, holy. It was a year marked by movement — not always visible to the eye, but deeply felt in the unseen spaces of the heart. Faith has been my compass through it all. Each decision, conversation, and creative endeavour found its root in the quiet assurance that God was present, weaving even the painful threads into something redemptive. 📖 "He who began a good work in you will complete it until the day of Jesus Christ." — Philippians 1:6 (NKJV) Faith & Spirituality — The Anchor of My Becoming This year, I learned again that faith is not the absence of uncertainty but the steady heartbeat of trust in the middle of it. Through the Encounter Groups, Healing Trauma series, and creative gatherings, the Holy Spirit reminded me that transformation is slow, sacred work. There were moments when my faith felt stretched thin — yet grace never failed to find me there. Each session held at The Crate, each prayer whispered over those who came searching for healing, became another stone laid on the altar of God’s faithfulness. Love & Compassion — The Language of My Heart Love, I realised, is often quiet. It looks like showing up when you’re tired, listening when you’d rather speak, and forgiving when words have wounded. It’s the pulse beneath every encounter, the invisible thread that binds broken hearts back together. This year taught me that compassion begins at home — within my own heart. Healing cannot flow outward if I refuse to let it begin inward. Family & Relationships — The Circle of Grace Through both the tender and testing moments with Clive, Jesse, and Misha, I saw the Lord refining my understanding of what love truly requires: patience, humility, and forgiveness. Conversations that once carried tension became opportunities for healing. Even unspoken prayers found gentle answers in time. My family remains my first ministry — the living canvas where God’s grace keeps writing new beginnings. Community & Service — The Hands and Feet of Faith From Creative Connect Groups to Healing heARTs💖 gatherings, community became the rhythm of my ministry. These moments were not about numbers but about hearts — each one precious, each one a testimony of God’s ongoing restoration. The Identity & Destiny series opened doors for others to rediscover purpose, while the Mandarin Healing Trauma sessions reminded me that language is no barrier when the Holy Spirit leads. Service became less about doing and more about being — simply being present, compassionate, and faithful. 📖 "Let all that you do be done with love." — 1 Corinthians 16:14 (NKJV) Creativity — The Overflow of the Soul My brushes carried more than paint this year; they carried prayer. From “Skyward Bloom” (#1270_20250606) to the gentle hues of each new piece in my portfolio, every artwork became a conversation with God. Through colour, texture, and light, I found healing in the act of creation — beauty rising from the ashes once again. The studio became a sanctuary — a space where heaven touched earth through art, worship, and honest reflection. Growth & Learning — The Journey of Becoming 2024 stretched me as a leader, facilitator, and creative soul. From the Speakers Institute Bootcamp to Live2Lead Auckland, each experience deepened my confidence and refined my voice. I learned to hold space for others without losing myself — to lead with humility and authenticity. Growth this year meant choosing to stay teachable, to rest when needed, and to trust God’s timing over my own. Integrity, Courage, and Freedom — Living Authentically in Truth I found courage not in grand gestures but in quiet obedience. Saying yes to God’s invitations — and sometimes no to distractions — was its own act of faith. Integrity guided each step as I navigated leadership, ministry, and creativity. Freedom came, not as escape, but as alignment — living true to who God designed me to be. 📖 "Where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom." — 2 Corinthians 3:17 (NKJV) Balance, Rest & Wellness — The Sacred Pause There were seasons when rest felt like rebellion — yet the Lord gently reminded me that rest is worship. My health became a mirror of balance restored: long walks, quiet evenings, laughter with friends, and time in the Word replenished my spirit. Balance isn’t perfection; it’s breathing in grace and exhaling gratitude. Beauty & Achievement — Redefining Success Beauty became a language of gratitude this year. I learned to see it in ordinary things — morning light on wet pavement, the sound of laughter, the shimmer of gold in broken pottery. Achievement, for me, no longer meant doing more but becoming more like Christ in the process. Success was measured not in accolades but in peace, in purpose, and in people transformed through love. 📖 "The Lord will perfect that which concerns me; Your mercy, O Lord, endures forever." — Psalm 138:8 (NKJV) A Closing Prayer for 2024 Heavenly Father, thank You for every joy and every tear that shaped this year. Thank You for the quiet miracles that unfolded when I least expected them. As I close this chapter, may I carry forward only what is holy, healed, and true. Teach me to walk into 2025 with renewed faith, anchored in Your love, guided by Your Spirit, and strengthened by Your peace. In Jesus’ Name, Amen. Final Reflection This year was not about arrival but alignment — about becoming whole, not by striving, but by surrendering. Every broken piece was gathered by grace, every detour redeemed by love. I end this year not with exhaustion, but with expectancy — ready to step into all that God is still unfolding.